let lemons be angry

Wonderful week. Last night was the long-awaited Traditional Indian Dinner with Jewish and Scottish Minorities Under the Stars On a Windy and Beautiful Night.  The jewish turned chinese, and the scottish turned fako-western, but there you go.  It was a windy and beautiful night, and it was a very traditional indian dinner.  I can't decide if i liked the cottage cheese cubes curry or the yoghurt salad more.  Of course, no indian night is complete without the Ridiculous but Wildly Entertaining Hindi Movie.  This one was called Hum Tum (Hum toom) and oh boy oh boy it was even funnier than the last one i watched.  Both incidentally involved a strong female and a flirt guy who initially really hate each other, but end up on each other's side and in love.  I'm just wondering if there's just one hindi female singer who sings for every movie.  I've decided that punjabis are definitely the most comfortable things in the world, when you have to choose between that and the cheongsam or sarong kebaya.  (Sarong kebayas are the worst.  Tight lace is no good for southeast asian weather, and the narrow skirt and dainty slippers make you only useful for sitting and peeling beans or beading slippers.)  The class can hang out together as a whole, the wonderful fun bunch that we are.  I just have no clue why sherman is scared of me.  Victor I can understand, what with all the ways i damaged his internal being during pw.  Renji's claim of almost being stabbed is farfarfarfetched, but still forgivable.  By right ivan should be scared of me because i yell at him, but he's not.  But sherman? 
 
She called me tonight to tell me that she's going abroad.  I had this curious sensation that i'll hear from her for the rest of my life.  That one meeting at marine parade was the beginning of something greater than i'd thought.  I don't know.  Psychology, counselling, can i live with that?  People like her just come to me, and i don't know if i've done anything to help with my "okay"s and "don't worry"s.  But i suppose i have made a difference.  The last time i'd heard from her was months ago, but she called me and talked to me as if i was a close friend who she confides in.  And she couldn't say goodbye, i had to say it finally.  She's a total stranger who God just sent to me, and i feel like if anything, goodbye was something she didn't want to hear.  In how many ways have i been blessed so abundantly, when i don't deserve it any more than she does?  Here i am in this school, with these hobbies and these exams, and this family, and these friends, when it could just as well have been otherwise. Even when she slips my mind, her life still goes on, she has to deal with the things that i have the luxury of temporarily forgetting.
 
Why do i wonder if it's me?