let lemons be angry

Fiver.

He followed my father home one day and made it a point to never leave after that. We suspect he's part dog because he follows us around the house without pride and cannot purr. At his happiest he makes a satisfied grunting noise, but as much as I squeeze his belly I can't get a purr out of him. For all his strength and bulk he can't hunt; his eyes focus on things slowly and he doesn't have the instinct to hurt. His simple mind has given us a lot of pain. When he was a stray he'd let himself get beaten by an old lady with her umbrella, he has walked out and gotten lost, and he almost died from eating three metres of string.He spends most of his time sitting contentedly and squinting up at us, until some sudden movement or sound sends him running in fright. If we hug him he panics, not knowing what has hit him. But when he's in the right state of mind, he likes to come burrow in my lap and sleep in front of my computer screen.




ET.

I grew up with this cat, and sometimes I wonder if I got my personality from her, or she from me. She chose me when she was six weeks old. She was a little monster of a kitten, with fur that stuck out and large alien eyes. She chose me by walking towards me and promptly falling asleep in my arms. For such a sweet start, she turned out to be a ruffian, destroying things to get attention and because she likes to see me frustrated. She bites and plays and has a range of disgruntled expressions. Fiver annoys her by approaching her slowly and densely. She despises him, I know. She has killed a countless number of creatures in this house, including a bird that unluckily flew into our living room. When I look at her, she stares right through me. She stares into space when she's waiting for me to give her water. But she's only pretending to be cool, because she can't hide her purrs no matter what her face says. And she's really not cool at all. Sometimes her tongue sticks out and she forgets to put it back in. She'd die if she knew. And she vomits. Other cats cough out furballs, but she vomits out food as well, and they come out whole, in their original biscuit shapes.