let lemons be angry

I've got a good mind to throw it all away.

The most exhausting time of the day is the busride home. I sit or stand and pretend to be bored, when really I can't unknot my brain around the million things it carries. I stagnate, I have imaginary conversations, I try to position my ankles at fascinating angles. My spoilt music player forces me to be attentive to the real world. I love my day until I take the busride home.

On the bus home today I even wished there was tvmobile. I thought about dg tomorrow and how unworthy I am to lead it. I thought of how I want a break from being controlled, for a day or two. I thought about the lantern festival at my lake that I missed. I thought about my long lost neighbours. I thought about mediocre couples and their love, far from mediocre. I thought about all my projects and their dead ends. I thought about all my nine p.m. dinners.

Whenever I wonder how my life could be improved, this is the answer. Better busrides home. I'm convinced of it.