(photo: from transcool tokyo exhibition couple weeks ago)
Feeling a bit helpless now as the kids' camp pulls into the station, and I'm still straddled on the train track watching it come.
Last week I taught some brand new volunteers the basics of RFKC- the same stuff that started me on this journey five years ago. I might love RFKC a bit too much. I'm so afraid that if I want this too much, I will crush it.
So I'm staring at the schedule I've drafted for one week of camp, wishing there was more space in each excel spreadsheet cell to scribble notes, wondering if we will have money to make each timetable cell come to life.
We can plan all we want, be motivated all we want, but God still sails this ship.
Do you know what has kept me going this whole year? The memory of C crying one year ago on the last day of camp, and telling me she didn't want to leave the children's home to go back to her natural family because that would mean she can't come for RFKC anymore.
What is this camp, what is so great about it? The kids just sing songs, pick at their food, run around, line up for showers, play games. The first time I volunteered, I was so tired the first day that I couldn't believe there were four more days to go. I counted down every day with increasing glee. And then the last day came, and I found my kids crying because they didn't want to go back to where they'd come from.
The little we give is ten thousand times greater in their eyes. So I must go back, I must make camp happen for them. That is all that drives me. But God, do you want a greater motivation from me than that?
No comments:
Post a Comment