The one thing worse than scooping dead fish out? Picking their remains out because the silly guppies chose to get sucked into their tank filters.

It's been a whole day spent with my arm submerged in dirty tank water. Thank God for Heroic K who helped me dispose of the decomposing bodies. And while all that fishy drama was going on, ET had to vomit out her few biscuit pieces just to test my patience. I need my father to come home quickly!

My mother would say, "Secretly throw away all the fish!"

This is what we do to get them to sit peaceably next to each other. Then we take photos and laugh at them. The parents are gone again, which leaves me with these two nutheads for companions. To wake me up, ET (right, female, older) lands her furry lump of a body against my face. If my eyes open even a crack, there's no end to the racket she makes.

Fiver (left, male, younger but huge and slow) wails and scratches at the door. He doesn't like being alone in the living room all by his hungry self. You will see that he is looking at ET's food although he has the same food in his own bowl. They like to compare and swap food, and have come to a mutual agreement to do so.

We put only 6-10 little biscuit pieces into their bowl at a time, because ET is bulimic and six little biscuits aren't easy for her to gag out. Fiver eats very slowly, settling his whole tummy on the ground and chewing one biscuit at a time with eyes half-closed. He eats about three biscuits and then leaves.

My only other housemates this week are the many fishes in the balcony. There's an arowana with ten goldfish swimming around him, forgetting every five seconds that their companions disappear one by one into his bloody jaws. There are discuses who wheel their one-dimensional, one-eyed circular bodies towards me. There are fighting fishes in mini tubs suspended within a larger tank. They all require different food. I hate them. I have a recurring nightmare that I'm cleaning a fish tank and fishes plop themselves out of the water and I have to save them. I hate them, but the one thing worse than cleaning their tanks is scooping out dead fish, so I will take good care of them.