a little lost

Four months, and I'm starting to remember that once upon a time I:

- came home to dinner already cooked, and when I finally stirred from post-work laziness, I would set the table, eat, and walk away...

- zoned out for hours on my sofa, waiting for ten o'clock when I would talk to k. "Reporting time" as my mother called it.

- had nothing to do on sundays

- lay on my double-decker bed imagining what it would be like to lie next to someone
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And further away still are memories that I once:

- explored museums on my own

- gave myself photo projects, and developed film rolls

- had sleepovers with girlfriends that involved little or no sleep

- kept diaries and notebooks and drew for fun

- made plans with friends all the time

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Phases of life. Instagram killed the camera. iPad games killed creative free time.
But something once in me is a little lost, and nothing and nobody can be blamed for it.
I have some free time everyday, if I portion out my day properly.
Some of these things must be regained.