let lemons be angry

I'm sitting in my dad's office now, with more privileges to his drawers and files than any of his staff. What an empowering thought. I like poking through his organised space--there's something charmingly him about the way he puts things where they are. Post-its in one stack, pens in one box, non-pens in another box, apricot-chocolate muesli bars in his "break" drawer for when he wants to feel healthy, along with "break" items like a beatles chord book and vintage bronze acoustic strings, his favourite photographs taped onto the wall behind me. He's planned his life well with this arrangement. He's put work stuff in his bottom drawers, and filled the rest of the room with personal stuff, and my mum and i come right on top. His office overflows with music--guitars, keyboard, cds, vcds, speakers, stereo, songbooks. I wonder when he actually gets down to work.

I wouldn't be here if i had got the message telling me that training time's changed to 12:30 (when the sun's most murderous, how brilliant), forcing me to change my plans. This plan works fine by me. I remember hogging my dad's computer when i used to spend whole days in his office, wearing his huge jacket and making trips to the pantry for packet drinks and biscuits. He'd try to entertain me with his gadgets and i'd be entertained. I'd write storybooks with pictures and play imaginary games. When there was nothing else to do i'd stare at his world map and pick out interesting names of countries. (that's how i named myself Princess Burma one day, it sounded pretty then) I don't do those things anymore and i hardly visit his office. But sitting here in the comfort of his constancy written in the things around me, i feel like that little princess again. I hope he's safe in hongkong.

I visited bong in her office yesterday and distracted her from her work for about fifteen minutes. That girl's going to have colourless hair one day, her colour's so light. PW is getting fun again with all the picture-finding, and it'll be over for good in two days' time. Let us all rejoice. And i have landed myself a holiday job! One of my mum's korean students rang her up asking if i could teach his daughter maths. It was absurd of him to assume that i'd be a suitable teacher, but there we go. I've always wanted to be a lower sec maths tutor. Not english, not anything else, because i know exactly how weak maths students think, and what maths jargon can't be understood in class, and i know how to explain it. I had to explain things to myself last time, because a lot of what the teacher said really didn't make sense. (difference of two squares? i never understood where the squares were or what shapes had to do with it, until i enlightened myself.) So yes, i will be tutoring a sec one girl in maths, yay to me. I shall shower her with sweets and inspiring stories. I must prove to a couple of people that i can be nurturing.