let lemons be angry

I've never felt stressed over school. There've been tonnes of undone history tutorials, maths tutorials, all the tutorials in the world that i never once touched at home, but I've never once felt compelled to do them. And today, i'm staying home "sick" because of undone art homework that i can't get away with not doing. Stress is such a new feeling to me. I've felt urgency and panic, but never this kind of helpless stress.

And I've been going to farewells every single day this week. My heart's been having to fill with stones and water and feel torn up every single day. One last cup of coffee with ashley, one last hug through her car window. One last talk-story afternoon with sheila and one last clasp of melting hands. One last helium ride in manda's car. I won't get to hear their voices in months. And because of all these necessary special farewells, now i'm up to my neck in work and feeling less than blissful. Yes yes yes and everything will be alright, but I'm just very tired. Somebody please call on the phone, don't message me okay, because my fingers don't like messaging anymore. It's tiring.