let lemons be angry

In an attempt to open the windows and let some bright sunshine in, I'm even listening to "Husan" by the Bhangra Knights. This must be serious.

I suppose this is what happens all the time to people who don't know when to stop. Eat too much ice cream and feel too full. Listen to your favourite song too many times and begin to hate it. Wear out your welcome.

I've been walking around feeling like there's a thunderstorm about to rage. A little scorpion in my belly making me worry worry worry too too much. Endlessly distracted--about what? I've been trying to find out. Ah, but T. Rex always makes it all better with their happy get-up-and-dance sentiment-free rock. I like men who sing like women but banish half-heartedness and vanity like men. That's why i like T. Rex and Led Zeppelin and Guns and Roses. I like the fact that Estelle is starting to wear black eye pencil the way i did. I like pushing myself but i need to be told that i can stop. I like guessing and feeling on the edge in that trippy way, but i need to be reassured of my guesses every single day. I like being in my own world but i don't want to be in my world all alone. I like sad songs but they can kill me if i'm not careful. I like pretending to be aloof, but you have to somehow know by instinct that that's not what i really mean. I like drama in my life, but sometimes enough is enough.

Raaaah. I annoy myself with all my demands. Such a demanding girl. Don't listen to her.