let lemons be angry

Is it more fun or unfair that i have no say in how i spend this day? You stupid stupid thing.

I have no agenda to carry out, and it's probably just as well. I've been trying to fill the holes in other people's lives, while my own boat is a big leaky mess. Still, how i wish you would force me out the house to embark on great children's adventures. I'd gladly give up feeling strong and free to be pulled along by a rope to strange and wonderful lands. The coffeeshop, the library, anywhere.

I'm bored with my own highly interesting life, because can't you see, it's all fabricated, as far from spontaneous as it gets. I planned this. But of course--that's why it doesn't work.