let lemons be angry

I remember now--the last time I cried. It was in a hospital foodcourt, in front of everybody. It was on 18th april this year. I didn't really know the girl I'd visited, and everyone was making their way to her ward in those days. It didn't matter.

Last night the girls were talking about my hardheartedness. Of movies, only two made me cry recently, but recently is still two years ago. I've never cried over failure. I have cried over loss, though. I've cried during prayer and when I'm angry, but never at airports. I cry when someone tells me on the phone of a death, and the crying continues over dinner. But I can't cry at funerals.

Still, the strangest things get to me. Sitting with a bowl of melting ice kachang while the world drifted by three floors down, and that sad, sad old Chinese music playing as if I belonged to that era, I did want to cry.