let lemons be angry

Pusan, 2007. The first meal, outdoors. I felt weird when people walked by and I really just wanted them to sit down.

Looks so lomo, but it's just clever reflection off the car roof and my estate being such a ballistic blue. It was an accidental photo, angled too high on the car hood and set on the timer.

When I pass it in my hallway late at night, on my way to a glass of water, I feel like wrenching it from its hooks and making a splendid crash. But I'll regret that won't I?

Coffee Club at Taka, with the GGs. Bench 1b night. I was a nest of butterflies.

Sentosa, some time past 9. I never knew an island could be so deserted.

Mongolia, afternoon. When I thought I had an unending supply of film and everything else.

Connect the dots if you can find them, and what do you get? Another lame blog entry about my calmer, sorrier state. Because it's written in the banner up there in clear english, that nothing is unsplattered with bits and specks of my innards as I explode each time, me and my sentimental heart. All these random moments not charted on the timeline are actually loaded with the heaviest weight, hope and wait and wondering.

It was the walking that did it. I walked from bugis to sunshine plaza and back to bugis, then back to sunshine, then to peace center, and back to bugis again, in the blazing humidity and my black layers and cursed heels. I walked till I was a deflated balloon, a sorry dog. I walked till all the reasons I was being strong and full of change seemed like silly reasons.

Can anyone tell me where "square one" came from? Dance steps? Puzzles? How did it evolve into a common phrase, such that we always come back to it?