Laughing at Virgins

There has been outrage in my country today. Bitter, disbelieving outrage.
Because the MOE has decided that all sex education teachers must believe in abstinence as the best form of birth control, and the family as the basic unit of society.

Some of the comments made:
That Singapore is going back in time with this move.
That it is impossible to practice abstinence when more people get married later in life.
That virgin teachers will be clueless about sex.
That they wouldn't want to learn about sex from virgins.

Some of the comments that weren't made:
That abstinence is, indeed, the only sureproof way to avoid STDs and unwanted pregnancies.
That encouraging our teenagers to stay pure for longer is not a bad thing.
That despite the number of people who do not practice abstinence, there are yet a good number who do. And a lot of them are eligible, normal, socially ept people, unlike society's rather grim stereotype of giggly adult virgins wearing their pants up to their chests.

How did the world come to this? How did society come to a mainstream consensus that virgins are to be laughed at on 9gag? That virginity is of no value? That it has become more socially acceptable to accidentally get pregnant with your boyfriend's child and abort the baby, than to be a virgin? No jokes are made about such mothers. And certainly nobody is worried that they might become sex education teachers. Yet the virginity disgust abounds.

Or else virgins are sexualised. Virgin Airlines' branding and advertising drips with overtones that its women are in fact not virgins. Elvis had infamous virgin fetish. So do a lot of men, pricing virgin prostitutes so much higher than regulars that hymen reconstruction is a standard surgical procedure for women in the trade. Yup, it seems that the only people who value virginity in this world are the perverts.

The rest of us are just labelled prudes or chronically uneligible. Females get away with it because they run the other risk of being labelled as sluts. Male virgins get it the worst. Their purity is never seen by other males as a choice, but as something weird and emasculating, possibly contagious.

I tweeted this: "I think virginity is highly underrated. #virginMOEteachers"
and got this reply: "the corollary is that sex is highly overrated?"

I wanted to say yes. But not in the way that you might think.
You are only thinking of the enjoyment of sex.
Which is narrow, too narrow for us.

Some of you know it inside. Wrong men. Condoms that broke. Aborted foetuses. You know what you would have erased. There is no protection for the heart. Was it worth the hype, or was it overrated? Would you put another young person through it? Or would you stop her at fifteen and advise her to simply walk away?

On the other hand, you have virginity, precious because it can be lost forever. Making singles save themselves for the one they will marry, as an exclusive gift. Making couples learn to use other love languages to get intimate before marriage. Saving unwanted babies. Even if you're not compelled by God to abstain, the benefits of abstinence are there for all. It is not self-serving; it looks out for others. Even the ones not conceived yet.

Virginity--an internet joke. With great value never ever talked about.

Today my country was in outrage over my government's decision. A very "backward" decision.
Most of the time I scoff at my government's decisions. But today I want to thank my government for being backward, for giving back value to what is priceless anyway.

Sincerely,
A Virgin.